There is ONE thing that has become CLEAR to me in the past 3 months. And I have heard many mothers echo this. Here it is: 👇 💫WE NEED TO CHANGE HOW WE TALK ABOUT THE IMPACT OF MOTHERHOOD ON IDENTITY. 💫 It’s NOT a dark shameful secret to have changed after becoming a mother. There’s NOT much out there about how motherhood can be an EMPOWERING & TRANSFORMATIVE time for women and their identity. Instead, identity & motherhood is often approached from the place of loss and deficit. This makes me SO sad for all the beautiful women out there. We hear: 🍃 “I lost myself in motherhood’ 🍃 “I’m not the person that I used to be” 🍃”I don’t even know myself anymore” But, it DOES NOT need to be like that!!! 🦋 There’s NO reason that changing should feel shameful. 🦋 There’s NO reason why we shouldn’t be talking about it. 🦋 There’s NO reason why we shouldn’t be embracing this. Having a different relationship with yourself can be profound, and can really allow us to navigate the continuing journey of being a woman & a mom with a DEEP SENSE of knowledge about the self. 👉Are you with me??? We need a different conversation around the topic of the impact of motherhood on identity. Our culture is obsessed with predictability and having things figured out. Unfortunately, this obsession doesn’t stop with women thinking that we should know ourselves and have ourselves figured out. I GET IT, It can feel distressing to realize that you’ve changed. That the person who others think you are has changed. It creates de-stabilization within the self and can impact relationships. 🌱 Sound familiar? Think of this for a moment: 👉Did you think twice the last time your phone or computer prompted you to install system updates? 💻 Most likely not. 🤯 Why? Because you phone could no longer operate in its full potential running on the old version. We all know how slow, tedious, frustrating it can feel to have an outdated device! 💫 So, mama, as opposed to operating on an old version of yourself that desperately needs an upgrade (and really working against yourself); seize this opportunity to begin your own upgrade! Yours in transformation, Jen ⚡️Make sure you get on the waitlist to my IDENTITY ALCHEMY JOURNEY for mothers online 3-month group coaching program, so you have FIRST access when it’s launched.
💥I am offering a 10% DISCOUNT on total cost to waitlist subscribers! You don’t have to commit to anything yet! There are very limited spots!
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This is not your typical “Laundry & Motherhood” blog post. 🧺 We have all seen them; the graphic pictures and posts warning us that motherhood will be a never-ending pile of laundry. 🤯 Or the blog articles of 5 tips on “How to stay on top of the laundry as a mom”. Or even better: “Good moms have dirty floors and big laundry piles.” 🙈 You know what I am talking about! But you see, this stuff never really fit for me anyway. 🤷♀️ Because conforming to some type of motherhood mold not only feels restrictive but also closes off space for me to live my FULL potential as a mother AND as a WOMAN. Because, after all, I exist too. Last week, I was confronted with my own pile of laundry saga, dilemma, story-call it whatever it is. So, this is how the story goes: 👇 There was a significant-sized laundry pile that I kept putting on my bed at the beginning of the day to “get to” folding AND (surprise, surprise), the day went by, and that pile of laundry was still there during bedtime routine. So, of course, the pile went back in the hamper before I collapsed my tired body into bed at night. And I repeated this predictable pattern more times than I can count over the course of the week. Sound familiar? I know you’ve been there too mama… 🙋♀️ Here is the crux of what this post is about… The first day of the laundry pile story, my internal talk went a little like: “oh well, tomorrow”, with a plan in my mind of course to fold it “later”. Then, day after day, I began silently judging myself for “not getting to it”. Looking back, I was not very gentle to myself in my head. My negative self-talk was through the roof! Each day, my body tensed up and just the sight of the hamper instantly created an internal feeling of stress and I noticed myself becoming short with others. It took me a solid few days to consciously recognize what I was doing to myself. 🌱 I WAS ALLOWING AN INANIMATE PILE OF OBJECTS DEFINE MY WORTH. I spent AN ENTIRE WEEK internally (subconsciously) judging myself because of clothing that could not care less about what happens to it. I was well on my way to the road of shame. So here’s the thing: 👉 The laundry pile DOES NOT define who YOU are. 👉 The laundry pile DOES NOT judge you. 👉 The laundry pile DOES NOT care about your intentions. And it’s not just the laundry, it could be ANYTING in your life that provokes how you feel about yourself. So, how about we free ourselves from all the inner turmoil we place on ourselves and instead focus on internal resources and energy toward what makes us FEEL ALIVE? 🙌 That’s something that can be EXTREMELY POWERFUL! Because, this will allow you, not only to be in different relationship with yourself BUT ALSO create an identity that is grounded in gratitude for what you do & what is TRULY important to YOU. ✨ The message here is not to “just give up” on everything. But rather, to have a conscious awareness of your relationship with “the laundry” or whatever the thing is, so that your internal self-talk is empowering and affirming. 💫 And not shame-inducing. ✨When we are truly conscious of our own internal talk and the energy we put toward it, we can transcend the culturally conditioned messages of what we ought to do and move toward acceptance and appreciation of what is. Because YOU matter. And, seriously, fuck the laundry pile! 🧺 You’re SO MUCH MORE than that. 💛 Yours in transformation and strength, Jen ⚡️ Want more support on finding time to ground yourself, go the download my FREE GUIDE to 3 Mini-Moments to connect with yourself when EVERYONE needs something for you. 🔥 Stay tuned, later this week, I will be opening my WAILTIST for my 3-month online IDENTITY ALCHEMY JOURNEY FOR MOTHERS Group Program. Sign up for my mailing list and be the first to know. Oh, and join me on my one-day IGNITED MOTHER RETREAT on August 26th! Early Bird rate will end SOON!🐣 |
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